Chapter 19 - Starting at Zero
Their first date happened on a Tuesday.
Nathan arrived four minutes early.
Emma checked the clock deliberately.
“Impressive.”
“I considered arriving thirty minutes early.”
“That would have been alarming.”
They ate at a small seafood restaurant overlooking the harbor.
Nobody recognized them.
Nobody asked about Whitmore Global.
Nobody photographed them.
Nathan turned his phone face down.
Emma noticed.
“You can answer it.”
“I know.”
“It could be important.”
“So are you.”
Emma looked at him.
Years earlier, that sentence would have sounded romantic.
Now it sounded like a practice he was trying to learn.
Their second date was coffee.
Their third was a walk with Isabel.
Their fourth ended badly.
Nathan mentioned a possible consulting role requiring monthly travel to Europe.
Emma became quiet.
He noticed.
Instead of dismissing her fear, he asked.
“What did that bring up?”
Emma looked at him.
“You disappearing again.”
Nathan nodded.
“I want the work.”
“I know.”
“But I don’t want the old life.”
“Then don’t take it.”
Nathan shook his head.
“That isn’t the solution either.”
He thought for a moment.
“What if I limit it to four trips a year and no trip longer than five days?”
Emma studied him.
“You don’t need my permission.”
“I’m not asking permission.”
“Then what?”
“I’m making decisions with the knowledge that other people exist.”
Emma looked down.
That was the change.
Not quitting every job.
Not rejecting ambition.
Remembering that love occupied real space on a calendar.
Three months later, Nathan sold the Manhattan penthouse.
Emma was shocked.
“You loved that place.”
“I loved what it represented.”
“What did it represent?”
“That I made it.”
Nathan smiled sadly.
“Then one night I walked into it and realized I had made everything except a home.”
He kept a smaller apartment in New York for work.
Most weeks, he lived in Newport.
Not with Emma.
Two streets away.
Isabel learned to recognize his voice.
She smiled whenever he entered the bookstore.
Eleanor visited once a month.
Rachel eventually returned from Denmark and laughed when she discovered Nathan Whitmore stocking shelves.
“You know those are alphabetical, right?”
Nathan stared at the stack in his hands.
“I was applying freight principles.”
Rachel looked at Emma.
“He needs supervision.”
Emma smiled.
“Yes.”
One night, nearly a year after the gala, Nathan and Emma walked along the beach while Isabel slept against Nathan’s chest.
Emma stopped.
“I never filed the papers.”
Nathan knew exactly which papers.
He did not move.
“The separation agreement.”
“Yes.”
“Why are you telling me?”
Emma looked toward the ocean.
“Because I don’t want them anymore.”
Nathan’s eyes filled.
He took one step toward her.
Then stopped.
“You’re sure?”
“Yes.”
“Does that mean—”
Emma lifted one hand.
“It means I don’t want a divorce.”
Nathan closed his eyes.
Emma continued.
“It does not mean we return to the old marriage.”
“I don’t want the old marriage.”
“Neither do I.”
Nathan looked at her.
“Then what do you want?”
Emma smiled through tears.
May you like
“I want to see whether we can build a new one.”
Nathan began crying before he could answer.
